Help....I'm Full of Fail!!!!

Fortunately, all (three) Rosezilla readers are full of win! To prove it, I'm giving away a Prepara Chef's Center. This cool gadget holds your cookbook while you cook, protects it from "splatter" and even has an awesome conversion chart. Retail valued at $40, its free to a commenter who answers the following question:

If you were a vegetable, which veggie would you be?

(contest open until June 30th, winner will likely be chosen at random)

Help...he's smothering me!!!

Dear Rosezilla,

I've started seeing this guy (2 dates), and things have been fine. I think I've made it pretty clear that I'm busy and I have a couple other casual relationships in addition to this gentleman. Still, we've just seen each other twice in one week and he already wants to meet up again. How do I get him to chill out a little?

Chilling out in Brooklyn

Dear Chilling,

I had to double-check that this letter was from a woman, since isn't this typically a man's problem? Most men I know would handle a situation like this by calling/texting less and less, while the woman becomes confused and starts calling/texting more and more. Before you know it, he's deleting desperate 'dont u like me!?!?' texts from his phone and she's left to pick up the pieces.

I don't know about you, but when I text or call a guy, I'm fairly ok with, 'I'm busy, but let's plan to hang out in a week or two.' Keep your time boundaries firm and its probably going to be fine...this guy is excited to go out with you and that's certainly not a bad thing.

If you find yourself negotiating your boundaries, i.e., you say one week, he says no, three days, then its simply time to redraw them. Have a frank talk or email that says firmly:
1. I like you and enjoy my time with you.
2. I'm busy.
3. I am not interested in a monogamous relationship and if he is, it's probably best to stop seeing each other for your mutual sanity.

Help, I'm undervalued!

Dear Rosezilla,

My family is wealthy and prestigious. I am a member of MENSA and I have a degree is neuroscience and theology from an Ivy League school. I'm multi-lingual and have excellent hygiene.

Yet, I find myself working at a computer help desk, making barely $50,000 a year. How did I miss the gravy train to wealth town?

-Undervalued

Dear Undervalued,

If you simply want to make money, become an ibanker or consultant. Try DE Shaw, they're hiring bright young people like yourself.

I'm not a blue blood or intellectual, but I know plenty of normal folk who seem constantly blessed by life. If there's a raffle, they win. If they're laid-off, they're hired by a better company in a week.

I can only assume that you, like me, are not one of those people. So, you're going to have to put in considerable work to get a high-paying job: medical school, law school, constant rejections, crappy bosses, work that turns out to be miserable. For every 100 units of mental energy you put into your efforts to self-improve, you're lucky to get 5 back. And then you might get laid-off. Life is a series of meat grinders in an ocean of acid.

One other thing. I would guess that you don't know what you want to be when you grow up. Those lottery-winning, happy-go-lucky fools know they want to be doctors or firemen from the time they're 5, but the rest of us haven't got a clue. For us, I think the only thing to do is fake it. Pick something out of a hat, pretend its your life-long dream, and go with it.